Beauty

Once upon a time, last summer to be exact, I was traveling abroad with some of my best friends all over Europe.  It was absolutely incredible, something I'll have to get more into detail about another day.  As we walked the streets of Europe, a couple of my friends and I would notice some posh, chic, beautiful, stylish girl walking down the street and we would immediately say, "Are you kidding me?  She's adorable.  Did you see her outfit?!  She is so tiny!" and on and on and on.  While yes, these women were beautiful, there was a trend in our comments throughout our travels.  Can you guess what that was?  "She's so tiny." "She was itty bitty!" Apparently that was a comment that we made so much, that one of my friends was fed up with our comments and called us out on it.  She said, "why does every single person you guys point out as 'beautiful' or 'gorgeous' have to be skinny?"  It stung.  We of course responded with, "They don't have to be skinny to be beautiful." But I couldn't get her comment out of my head.  It has stuck with me since that day.

I kept questioning myself, do I really believe that?  Am I really that shallow?  And unfortunately, I had to be honest with myself.  You see, I have never particularly been confident or happy with my body.  There's always something that I want to fix, and I have always looked at myself in comparison to others.  No, I don't believe that you have to be skinny in order to be beautiful, but there was something to be said in the trend of my thoughts.  I pointed out all of those beautiful and skinny women, because I wanted to be like them.  I wanted to be skinny, stylish, and everything else that they were.  Sound familiar? Of course it does.

George Tesui: "Looking in the Mirror"

For centuries, women have done such stupid things to achieve this idealistic beauty that is unattainable.  A few months ago I went to a presentation with my mom about fashion through the decades.  I learned about fashion from the 1840's to the 1960's.  In each decade, there was something so idiotic that women were doing for the sake of beauty and of course we all laughed and thought, 'why would these women do that to themselves?' The truth is, 50 years from now women will be saying the same thing about our generation.  It is the same problem, just manifest in a different way. Women risk their lives for beauty, whether it be the tight lacers back in the days of corsets, or the eating disorders of today, something has got to change.  It is a bigger problem than anyone can fix, but I know that I can fix the problem in myself, and hopefully I can teach my daughters what I know and they can fix the problem in themselves. Hopefully all of you try to fix the problem in yourselves.

It's no secret that each and every one of us has some sort of issue with our body image, even the people who in our minds, have perfect bodies.  We are constantly wishing we could look like someone else, and that is just sad.  Each and every one of us is beautiful, no matter what our body shape may be!  We need to stop focusing on all of the things we believe to be 'wrong' with our bodies.  We need to stop beating ourselves up over every little flaw and imperfection.  It has got to stop!  For all of us.  We cannot constantly bash ourselves for being imperfect. Everyone is.  I have heard complaints from women of all shapes and sizes about their bodies, and it is just sad.  I know it is easier said than done, but let's see if we can reverse the way in which we view ourselves and others.  Imagine how much different our children may think of themselves if we simply change our own thoughts?

If you're holding yourself accountable to reach perfection, you're never going to get there.  What you can and should hold yourself accountable for is becoming your best self.  You're never going to look like Angelina Jolie, because you're not her. Because Angelina Jolie is a) a woman and b) famous she probably has things that she is self conscious of as well! That goes with every woman that you view as "perfect."  Be your best self in all aspects of your life.  If you feel like you need to work out more, by all means, do it!  But do it for you, do it for your health, do it so you can improve your quality of life!  If you feel like you need to be more spiritual, then seek the things that your spirit is lacking.  Do you feel like you need some intellectual balance?  Read a book, go to a museum, learn something new. Just be a well balanced person.  Be the best you can be in all areas of your life.  Stop comparing yourself to others, and focus on yourself (I don't mean that selfishly). Beauty isn't just skin deep, and it's something that each of us would do well to remember, myself included.

Stuck in a Rut?

Lately, I have lacked motivation big time.  I don't know what it is, I'm stuck in a rut.  I miss my family and friends. I wake up in the morning, and it feels like I haven't slept all night.  I go to work, and I can't wait to get home.  I cook dinner, but I look for the fastest ways to do all of these things.  You know what I am lacking?  Passion.  For everything.  I don't know if it's just me, but this happens to me every now and again, and I have to evaluate what I am doing and what needs to change, and when I do, suddenly all is right in the world again.  You see, I know that I have no one to blame but myself.  I've let myself get lazy and complacent.  It's something that I fall into easily.  Patterns that I get into and it takes me awhile to realize just what I am doing to myself.  So, here's a few things that I know I need to change, and while I'm still struggling to get myself out of this rut, I've noticed some huge changes in the way that I feel since I've been doing them.  If you find yourself in a similar situation, may I suggest that you do a few of these things as well!

• Do something you love. Simple enough, right?  Wrong.  So often we get caught up in the things that we have to do, and we forget to make time for the things that we like to do.  For me, these activities include reading, enjoying nature, and creating something, whether it be a painting, something for my home, or a pretty meal, they make me happy.  
• Get Physical.  Something we all can do more of.  I got so caught up in work this summer, and I'm embarrassed to say my workout regimen was almost nonexistent.  Sometimes we fall off the wagon, and that's okay!  Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days... yeah. That just happened.  I quoted Hannah Montana, loud and proud. Anyway, exercise doesn't have to be running 3 miles and lifting weights.  There are so many forms of exercise that you can do, and I promise you can find something you love.  Here are some things I love to do, and you might too.  Yoga is a great way to sculpt, tone, burn fat, etc.  I absolutely love Yoga!  And no, it is not easy, pretty much anyone who has taken a class will tell you that.  Rock Climbing is also a great form of exercise.  And it is so much fun!  Hiking, biking, swimming, (laps of course.  Walking in a pool isn't really exercise) dancing, tumbling, etc.  These are all great forms of exercise, and they don't require going to a gym ore even spending lots of money on memberships.  Find something you love to do, and then do it a lot!
• Sleep.  Something we all need more of, amirite?!  Jason and I are total night owls.  We love to stay up late and watch movies together.  It is so bad for your health when you don't get enough sleep!  So, Jason and I have been making a goal to go to bed at 11 every night, and so far it has made a huge difference.  I know 11 isn't early to some people, but for us it is!  Baby steps.  Early to bed, Early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.  That is the absolute truth.  If you can get into a good sleeping habit, it will make all the difference in the world.  
• Drink water.  I may be the only person who has trouble doing this, but I have a feeling that I'm not.  A good rule of thumb is to divide your body weight in half, and that's how many ounces you should be drinking per day.  If you're working out a lot, you're going to need more than that.  It's so important to be well hydrated, and I'm sure we've all heard this a million times, so I wont bring up the millions of statistics and articles about the importance on this topic.  Just drink water, okay?  
• Serve others.  I would be lying if I said I am perfect at this, and most of the time if I am assigned to visit someone or help somebody I don't know, my first thought is, why me? I don't have time for this. blah blah blah, selfish selfish selfish.  However, every single time I serve someone else and get outside myself, I feel so grateful and humbled and put in my place.  That is what life is about, guys.  This week I had the opportunity to visit some investigators with the sister missionaries, and I cannot tell you the light and joy that it brought me.  I was able to see people changing, their testimonies beginning to grow, and their happiness was evident.  I was so touched, and I felt like a big jerk because of my attitude before I went.  Luckily, life is about learning and growing, and I think I learned my lesson.  

Since I have been doing these things, I have noticed the hugest difference in the way I feel, in the amount of time I have in the day and how much I am able to accomplish, and ultimately, my happiness.  There's always room to improve and grow, and these are simple ways in which I have improved in my own life, and I'm grateful that we are always given the chance to improve ourselves for the better.  Namaste.  Can you tell I've been really into Yoga lately?  I'm curious, what things have you done to increase motivation and happiness in your life?

P.S.  We are getting a dog.... and I couldn't be more excited!!!