Beauty

Once upon a time, last summer to be exact, I was traveling abroad with some of my best friends all over Europe.  It was absolutely incredible, something I'll have to get more into detail about another day.  As we walked the streets of Europe, a couple of my friends and I would notice some posh, chic, beautiful, stylish girl walking down the street and we would immediately say, "Are you kidding me?  She's adorable.  Did you see her outfit?!  She is so tiny!" and on and on and on.  While yes, these women were beautiful, there was a trend in our comments throughout our travels.  Can you guess what that was?  "She's so tiny." "She was itty bitty!" Apparently that was a comment that we made so much, that one of my friends was fed up with our comments and called us out on it.  She said, "why does every single person you guys point out as 'beautiful' or 'gorgeous' have to be skinny?"  It stung.  We of course responded with, "They don't have to be skinny to be beautiful." But I couldn't get her comment out of my head.  It has stuck with me since that day.

I kept questioning myself, do I really believe that?  Am I really that shallow?  And unfortunately, I had to be honest with myself.  You see, I have never particularly been confident or happy with my body.  There's always something that I want to fix, and I have always looked at myself in comparison to others.  No, I don't believe that you have to be skinny in order to be beautiful, but there was something to be said in the trend of my thoughts.  I pointed out all of those beautiful and skinny women, because I wanted to be like them.  I wanted to be skinny, stylish, and everything else that they were.  Sound familiar? Of course it does.

George Tesui: "Looking in the Mirror"

For centuries, women have done such stupid things to achieve this idealistic beauty that is unattainable.  A few months ago I went to a presentation with my mom about fashion through the decades.  I learned about fashion from the 1840's to the 1960's.  In each decade, there was something so idiotic that women were doing for the sake of beauty and of course we all laughed and thought, 'why would these women do that to themselves?' The truth is, 50 years from now women will be saying the same thing about our generation.  It is the same problem, just manifest in a different way. Women risk their lives for beauty, whether it be the tight lacers back in the days of corsets, or the eating disorders of today, something has got to change.  It is a bigger problem than anyone can fix, but I know that I can fix the problem in myself, and hopefully I can teach my daughters what I know and they can fix the problem in themselves. Hopefully all of you try to fix the problem in yourselves.

It's no secret that each and every one of us has some sort of issue with our body image, even the people who in our minds, have perfect bodies.  We are constantly wishing we could look like someone else, and that is just sad.  Each and every one of us is beautiful, no matter what our body shape may be!  We need to stop focusing on all of the things we believe to be 'wrong' with our bodies.  We need to stop beating ourselves up over every little flaw and imperfection.  It has got to stop!  For all of us.  We cannot constantly bash ourselves for being imperfect. Everyone is.  I have heard complaints from women of all shapes and sizes about their bodies, and it is just sad.  I know it is easier said than done, but let's see if we can reverse the way in which we view ourselves and others.  Imagine how much different our children may think of themselves if we simply change our own thoughts?

If you're holding yourself accountable to reach perfection, you're never going to get there.  What you can and should hold yourself accountable for is becoming your best self.  You're never going to look like Angelina Jolie, because you're not her. Because Angelina Jolie is a) a woman and b) famous she probably has things that she is self conscious of as well! That goes with every woman that you view as "perfect."  Be your best self in all aspects of your life.  If you feel like you need to work out more, by all means, do it!  But do it for you, do it for your health, do it so you can improve your quality of life!  If you feel like you need to be more spiritual, then seek the things that your spirit is lacking.  Do you feel like you need some intellectual balance?  Read a book, go to a museum, learn something new. Just be a well balanced person.  Be the best you can be in all areas of your life.  Stop comparing yourself to others, and focus on yourself (I don't mean that selfishly). Beauty isn't just skin deep, and it's something that each of us would do well to remember, myself included.

Independence Day

This fourth of July was one for the books.  It was the first time Jason and I were able to celebrate it together, so that made it so special for me!  Last year, we were doing the whole long distance thing.  This year, we had planned to go to the beach, but since there was a hurricane headed straight for us, we decided to spend our fourth somewhere else.  We decided to go to Ashville.  It is about 3 hours away from Charlotte, and we both have been wanting to go there since we moved here.  Why Ashville, you ask?  Well, it is the home of the Vanderbilt Mansion, or otherwise known as the Biltmore Estate.  Anyone who loves art, history, nature, architecture, culture, etc. would absolutely love visiting the Biltmore!  I highly recommend it to anyone.

We spent all day looking around, and we were even mischievous and slinked into parts of the house that weren't for public viewing.... oops!  Really, I don't feel bad about it at all though... I'm the most curious little thing there ever was.  One time I was visiting Nauvoo and we were in Lucy Mack Smith's house, and I opened a drawer in her bedroom and I found a falling apart, hand written journal!  I was so excited!  I showed my Dad and he told me not to touch it, then he told the ladies who worked in the house and they sounded alarmed and they took care of it... ahhhh I just wanted to read it so badly!  I'm too curious for my own good.  Anyway, they didn't let us take pictures of the inside of the house, but the furniture and the art is absolutely gorgeous.  There was still clothing in the closets, and I was in heaven.  The library?  Don't even get me started on the library!  It is filled with thousands of first edition books that are hundreds of years old, and they were like... the prettiest books that I've ever seen!  Picture the library on Beauty and the Beast, only better.  And did I mention it is the largest home in the U.S?  If ever you get the chance to go to the Biltmore, GO!  Jason and I had such a great time!

After we were done with the inside of the house, we explored the gardens and the grounds, and then we went to the winery and they had free wine tasting!  Cool right?  Except we don't drink.... Luckily for us, they had fresh squeezed grape juice, so we took advantage of that.  We sat in the park and people watched, and everytime I saw a dog, I ran over to pet it.  It was just such a good day.  Then we went to dinner at Cedric's and we were able to sit out on the patio of the restaurant and watch the fireworks that the Biltmore puts on every year.  It was so magical.  I love America so much, and I am so incredibly blessed to live here!  On Sunday at church when we sang the National Anthem, it brought tears to my eyes as I thought of our history and those who came before us.  So many people have sacrificed for our freedom, and there aren't words to describe my gratitude for them!  If I know anything, I know that this is truly a blessed land, and that we are in fact, "one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty, and justice for all."  I love my country.  God Bless the U.S.A.